It never ceases to amaze me how ‘forward’ people can be when things don’t conform to the norm (whatever that is?!). I remember the ‘do you think you are having a girl?’ question was asked during my second pregnancy as we were already had a son. The polite answer was ‘We’re not sure…it’s such a different pregnancy to our first’ which was immediately met with the ‘Ooh! a Pigeon pair! One of each…just perfect!’
The next phase of this conversation develops once we had our second son and the question changed to ‘So are you going to try for a girl?’. The polite answer was ‘No, we’re really happy with what we have been blessed with and always agreed that 2 children are enough for our family’. This was met with one of those half oops not sure how to respond ‘I see’ sort of looks and nods of a head.
The actual thought processes to these discussions went more like this :
- Actually we’re having a boy and only my supportive husband and I know this and are really pleased because we don’t really care if it’s a boy or a girl, we’re just really happy that we’re both healthy.
- Are you being completely unthoughtful?!? Does our youngest son’s feelings not count?
- Not everyone needs to have 1 of each and in all fairness, I’m not a girly girl and so having 2 boys suits us completely.
- Whether it’s 2 boys or 2 girls or more than that or less or a ‘pigeon pair’ – there are loads of people who would give their right arm or entire body just to have 1 child!
What I am trying to say is that everyone is different and ‘abnormal’ to some is normal to others. We love our boys and wouldn’t change them for the world. We balanced our house with our girl dogs!