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Pigeon Pair – is it the bee all and end all?

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Waterfight…here we come!

 Pigeon Pairs – are they the bee all and end all?


I wrote a post a while ago on pigeon pairs  – check it out to give some clarity on my thought processes.

I’m a boy mom and love the title and all that goes with it.  Our boys are now 8 and practically 6 and we have such a great time doing loads of boy (and girl!)stuff. Yes, I am the only girl in our house and give most things a go.

I know for a fact, that their are loads of girl dad’s who are in the same boat and wouldn’t change their world. They too find themselves doing girl (and boy) stuff and love the time and memories they have with daughters.

So,  when I am still asked whether we are going to ‘try for a girl’ or I hear people saying ‘ooo! a perfect pigeon pair’ when someone has a baby that is the opposite sex to the child they currently have, I have to turn and walk away.

There is no point in trying to explain that a healthy baby is the most important thing of the entire family creation process and that whilst it’s human nature to label everything and anything, a ‘perfect’ pigeon pair to some is not what every parent thinks of as perfection.

I have mentioned our boys age, and so I can sort of see when they were toddlers, that the question of having more children may have been a bit more ‘acceptable’ to ask. But…asking me about it now, means one of 2 things :

      1. Maybe, we have been trying to have another baby and not been successful (this is NOT the case!!)
      2. We’re happy with our family the way we are and don’t need to explain that principle (this IS the case!!)

Just to be clear, we are not doing number 1, but what happens if whoever asks someone who is in that situation? How thoughtless!

The flip side of all of this nonsense talk is that there are loads of people who would give their right arm for just a child…1! You just have to look at the latest news with the Australian/Thai surrogacy items.

I think you are blessed with what you are blessed with. One thing I am going to carry on doing, is making sure that when someone asks me ‘Oh, you have 2 boys. Are you going to try for a girl?’ and it’s in front of our boys, is to remain calm and give them the honest answer of ‘No, we’re super happy with our boys and wouldn’t change a thing!’


A pigeon pair…nope happy with just boys

mumof2.com boys

It never ceases to amaze me how ‘forward’ people can be when things don’t conform to the norm (whatever that is?!). I remember the ‘do you think you are having a girl?’ question was asked during my second pregnancy as we were already had a son. The polite answer was ‘We’re not sure…it’s such a different pregnancy to our first’ which was immediately met with the ‘Ooh! a Pigeon pair! One of each…just perfect!’

The next phase of this conversation develops once we had our second son and the question changed to ‘So are you going to try for a girl?’. The polite answer was ‘No, we’re really happy with what we have been blessed with and always agreed that 2 children are enough for our family’. This was met with one of those half oops not sure how to respond ‘I see’ sort of looks and nods of a head.

The actual thought processes to these discussions went more like this :

  • Actually we’re having a boy and only my supportive husband and I know this and are really pleased because we don’t really care if it’s a boy or a girl, we’re just really happy that we’re both healthy.
  • Are you being completely unthoughtful?!? Does our youngest son’s feelings not count?
  • Not everyone needs to have 1 of each and in all fairness, I’m not a girly girl and so having 2 boys suits us completely.
  • Whether it’s 2 boys or 2 girls or more than that or less or a ‘pigeon pair’ – there are loads of people who would give their right arm or entire body just to have 1 child!

What I am trying to say is that everyone is different and ‘abnormal’ to some is normal to others. We love our boys and wouldn’t change them for the world. We balanced our house with our girl dogs!